Dear Husband

DEAR HUSBAND

Yesterday
 
 
I swam into the center of a dark star, the farthest point
from every other point,
 
 
the place
 
 
where people become shapes along the shore, where a mother
becomes the idea
 
 
of a mother, and a sister becomes the idea of a sister.
 
 
Here, everything is its opposite: trees, buildings, snow, Thursday, music,
boredom, regret.
 
 
Dear husband, I have been writing you letters, then erasing them,
then sending blank pages in the mail
as if to prove you really are
married
 
 
to a ghost. I swear
 
 
yesterday I dipped my hand in a pool of emptiness
and dragged up a dead dove. Do you realize what cruelty I’m capable of
 
 
when you leave me alone like this? Dear husband
 
 
I am thinking of a house with yellow curtains in a town that no one visits,
and where it always rains, a child
 
 
tying his shoelaces at the bottom
of a staircase.
 
 
Not this wind that knocks the power lines down.
 
 
Dear husband
 
 
yesterday, I unzipped the translucent skin of my tent to watch the mountains
glow pink somewhere
in Arizona. I swear
 
 
I saw a spark
ignite between two mirrors that faced each other in a field,
 
 
a silver necklace caught in the bare branches of a tree.
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